I recently started telling stories to K. Mostly animal stories like 'The Hare and the Tortoise' or 'Why the Cat Washes Itself After It Eats.' He loves them and begs for them and they even sometimes work as incentives to get him thru the shower. A few days ago, I told him the story about the mom who sings
'I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
As long as I'm living,
My baby you'll be.'
to her son every night after he's asleep. Even after he's grown up and moved out. The book is called 'Love You Forever' and it's written by Robert Munsch.
For those of you who don't know him, K is like the little boy in that book. Maybe more so than the boy himself. When K was 2 or 3, I quit keeping toilet paper on the holder because he'd unroll it every chance he got. When he was 3 or 4, he went thru a stage where he'd shout the f word around whenever something didn't go his way. About the same time, the only way I could get him to sleep without a fight was to wrap a blanket around us and go lie on the front lawn. Around 5, he started throwing things and making holes in walls. Now it's unusual for a day to go by without him shouting explatives at someone, hitting people, throwing things or just getting very very angry. I'll love him forever.
For those of you who don't know him, K can be the sweetest boy. When I came home the first time during the school year, he ran to me and clung to me and wouldn't let me go. He loves to feel helpful and do things for other people. He and Dad started this thing where Dad will flash him the 'love you' sign and he'll flash it back, even when he's mad. The rest of us have caught on and now it's an everyday thing. When he wants to give you a hug, he might back up as far as the house allows and then run and jump into your arms. I'll like him for always.
The difference between K and the boy in the book is that the boy in the book had a mother.
Tonight was hard. K decided he did not want to shower. However, since I had personally seen him try to sweep the floor with his hair, I knew he needed to shower. So we tried. Somewhere between 1030 and 1100, K's little elbow connected with my cheek bone. It didn't hurt enough to cry over, but with the stress of the moment I did cry. K didn't know what to think, he went silent. After what felt like forever tho, he gave in. A shower happened, albeit an hour later than planned. He got into bed. We read a story. And then he asked me to tell the story about the boy and his mother.
I did. But it was hard. Every time I came to the last line 'my baby you'll be' I started crying. My K has never had a mother like the one in the book. He's never known the constant care and attention of a mother's love. He's had a few mother figures, but a child needs one stable mom, not 5 off and on ones. So I cried for him, because how is his life going to work out. How will he grow up to lead a good life without knowing a mother's constant love. It hurts me. And it hurts me to know there are lots more children out in this world who don't have that. Who have to survive without that love.
I wish I could switch my K with that little boy in the Robert Munsch book. I wish he could have a real mother, not just 4 or 5 of us who aren't always there for him.
I'll love you forever, K.
I'll like you for always.
As long as I'm living,
My K you will be. ♡